One part play, one part video installation, one pinch quirky improvisation, this is a work which I’ll pay someone great sums to ghostwrite. It’s sort of my little service project to the world, providing an important new work of art that some people will be very moved by. Others (many others, according to a some actuaries I contacted) will wonder why the work was ever made in the first place. What a waste of taxpayer dollars! This will be shouted far and wide, even though I have used my own kids’ college funds to pay for the commissioning of the piece. Look, I’m risking my own neck on this by claiming that I’m the author of the work, though it’s mostly someone else’s. If there’s blowback from critics, I’m the one who takes the blame! (If it’s a success, however, well, I’m the one who gets the Pulitzer.)
Obviously, I need to work with the Pulitzer Prizes to establish the Video Art Drama category. This is essential before I plow money into commissioning the work and bribing public officials into attending the opening and overstating how “essential” the work is “for our schoolchildren.”
Here’s how I see it: the main character is a famous young athlete or movie star who grew up named Greg Krausen but now goes by the monosyllabic moniker “Chin”. It’s no accident: Chin’s chin is the envy of the free (male) world because everyone knows how much the gals like chins. Chin makes inordinately large millions of dollars doing his acting or athletic thing, and yet agrees anyway to hawk some kind of stupid conglomerate-owned snack product or electronics device or something (I’ll let my ghostwriter figure that out). This is where a voice from above (God? Chin’s deceased father? Perhaps just a random idiot caller on sports radio?) says, “Wait a minute, Chin! How much do you even know about that portable jock warmer for winter biking that you’re telling everyone to run out and buy? Why not just endorse some public service cause?”
Such as Patrick McVay’s (ghostwriter’s) work of dramatic video art!